Took Me a Lifetime 

Father sitting quiet and alone always caught my attention,
for not often his words parch, smiles empty,
not often does he sit on the porch
staring at still clouds and silent tree trunks,
his cup of coffee slumped in his hand,
half-drunk, cold, stained around the rim.
 
I remember the day I started wandering off,
trapping urges, and more urges to leave,
to join the cattle that migrated beyond
the shores in search of that something
I thought would make me happier
than the happiness I knew.

So when my call came I placed my lips on the letter
and kissed it long as it folded over my eyes,
and lived the next days becharmed,  not alive
to that question of what my father my mother
would feel after I was gone, a question
that gave me the slip between my choice and their loss.

Today, I have everything, even the happiness I came looking for -
it feels just like the one I had back home, back then; 
I have more - the truth that leads me to why
father sat there pondering over a son
who was leaving his land to go to another,
seeking something that he already had. 

All a Trade-Off
 
When I saw my friend, a team member
for five years, get traded away I understood
that we were pawns, little faceless fingers
that cut and caressed if you liked,
clutched and chopped if you liked.

Often there are truths that are better not handled,
not judged, not thrown in a lie detector
to extract the real truth -
they will not tell you what you want to hear,
but will admit what you already know:

That labor is survival, every man toils for something,
someone who wants it done, without nothing done
there is no next to move onto -
you become the old retired dud
who died in his hammock with no next to step into.

Of my teammate - that was done, he moved on, thought
he played better than before, made more locker-room friends,
relieved not to be with a team that had lost its way,
recommended me to his own club,
and I took up their hefty offer.

Let us call the clubhouse a microcosm of what all of us seek,
are part of in the bigger scheme, hence I fail to see why
this teammate packed his bags and returned to his farm
when they cut him loose that day
just to fit me in.